to escape, you must've been brave.

this has been quite the eventful past few days. i'm not quite sure how i can sum it all up effectively so i'll just say what i can. 

thursday i graduated, surprise! ha. it was crazy and in the rain and not as great as i'd have liked it to be. i wasn't really excited about the whole ceremony in the first place, but then it was decided that it would be outside in the pouring rain--not the greatest plan in my opinion. people were throwing beach balls and live rats and i was just not excited to be sitting there forever. also, there were five salutatorians and that took a freaking long time. a lot of my family came, which i really appreciated since the weather conditions were so hellish. 

after my name was called i left and went to spencer's mom's house. we pretty much just hung out there, which was the way i would have preferred to spend my graduation night: not partying and getting drunk off my arse like many of my classmates. besides, i just don't like parties and highly social situations. 

friday was sort of a blur for the most part. it rained more. in the late afternoon i headed out to gilbert to hang out with spencer some more. we hung out with brooke and his nana and his mom. then we went and packed for prescott. then we drove up there. we visited dad and brian at the motor lodge. 

saturday we went to breakfast and i had some delicious french toast with a side of regular toast. then spencer and i walked around town for a while, and we got a bunch of candy, because candy is delicious. we watched like three episodes of america's next top model. he's such a trooper. later cedar and ron came up and we talked to them for a while. then spencer and i went on an adventure to get a dvd player so we could watch eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, which we eventually accomplished after lots of struggle with purchasing additional cords to accommodate the old television that was in our room. later titanic was on, so we stayed in to watch it. i feel like an old woman because i hate going out. we went to bed pretty early. 

this morning we slept in then we headed back into town. i went to allison and karie's graduation fiesta, which was fun. then i came home and didn't do anything. i went to target to get poster frames, but they ended up being too big. i also bought light bulbs for the light fixtures in my bedroom, but the ones that i bought for my ceiling fan also ended up being too big. curses. since i've been home i've just been downloading music. i downloaded band of horses, aloha, arcade fire, and right now i'm downloading great northern.  next on my list is justice.

i am not especially happy with things right now. there are a couple of situations that are getting me down. and i really wish that things hadn't unfolded the way that they did. i just want things to be okay, and the way they were. not even the way they were, but just enough so that people could still be happy with one another and also have some change to make things better and more realistic for the way that things are. 

and sometimes i still feel that despite the way things are, i still am not enough to mend what has been broken. no matter how much i try, i don't think i'll ever be enough.